What is the Perfect Diet?
“What should I really be eating?” “What’s the ‘best’ diet?” A lot of women ask me these very questions. They want to know what to eat to boost their metabolism and give them more energy. They want to know what’s healthy. And they also don’t want their life to revolve around thinking about food. So let’s do a deep dive into food and diet, and figure out exactly what you should be eating.
Why is it so hard to figure out what to eat?
If you’re confused about what to eat, then first of all, let me say this: I feel for you. There is a TON of information out there and countless opinions when it comes to food and your health. You’re bombarded with it on the internet, you hear it on podcasts, read it in books, and even discuss it with your friends. Just the other day, I encountered a woman peddling a popular brand of meal-replacement shakes on the street corner in the center of town. Opinions on diet are literally everywhere.
But here’s the truth: it’s not as complicated as you might think. And in fact, you probably already know what you should be eating. It can just be tough to consistently put it all into practice.
The other thing is, certain foods and ways. of eating can be great for one person but not-so-great for another. There’s no one perfect diet. But there are a few general rules worth following when it comes to eating healthy. So here is my advice.
Leave the labels behind
Keto, paleo, Whole30, and to some extent even non-brand-name labels like vegan all have two things in common. First, they have pretty strict rules about what you can and can’t eat (and even when you can and can’t eat). Do you like restrictions? No? Didn’t think so. Second, these diets lead to you to look outside yourself for expertise about what to eat. You’ll always be eating according to someone else’s rigid rules. And for most people, even if a diet like keto can help you lose lots of weight, it’s usually not sustainable in the long run. Whoops, that’s a third thing these diets have in common! They don’t work for the long haul.
I’ve got better solutions.
Pay attention to your body
You have a great power inside you: the power of observation. You can eat, observe how you feel both mentally and physically, and then make future decisions based on those observations.
One thing I often hear from my coaching clients as they start shifting their diet is that when they have the occasional heavy, fatty, salty or sweet meal, they really feel it. And it’s not a good feeling. Bottom line: when a meal or food doesn’t sit right with you, that’s valuable insight. So start paying attention.
If you want to take things a step further, you could embark on an elimination diet to identify food sensitivities. That’s a topic for another blog post, but to give a quick example, many people find that when they cut out dairy, they feel a whole lot better and certain health problems (like eczema, acne, and even asthma) mysteriously vanish. So if you have some unexplained health issues, an elimination diet might be a good way to identify the culprits.
Eat whole foods, as close to the source as possible.
Forget the name-brand replacement shakes or made-for-you meals. Instead, focus on eating real food. Here’s a quick test. When you look at a food, can you immediately name it and know where it came from? If yes, you’re golden.
For example, when you look at an apple, you naturally know that it came from an apple tree. Vegetables and fruits don’t need labels- we already know what they are. That’s what you’re going for. Foods that require no label.
Load up on plants
Vegetables should take center stage in your diet. Try to get in as many different kinds as possible- especially leafy greens and cruciferous veggies (think broccoli and cauliflower). You’ll also want to get in plenty of colorful fruits (I go for berries pretty much every day), whole grains, and legumes.
Prioritize protein
Your body needs protein, and likely more than you’re currently giving it. You’ll want to consume somewhere between 1.2 and 1.6 grams of protein per kilogram of body weight; if you’re actively trying to build muscle, go for 1.8g/kg. And choose quality sources. Grass-fed organic beef, wild-caught seafood, and organic, pasture-raised poultry and eggs. Organic tofu, legumes, nuts and seeds.
Your body needs fat
Fat is not the villain. Unless your doctor has instructed you to avoid fat, include it in your diet. But the question here is, what kind of fat should you eat? You’ll want to make a concerted effort to eat sources of omega-3 fats every day. Some key sources: Fatty fish (salmon, sablefish, mackerel, herring, sardines, anchovies), seeds (flax, chia), walnuts, avocado, and olives. Avocado oil, olive oil and flaxseed oil are good too.
Limit inflammatory foods
I always recommend focusing on what you can and should eat (rather than what you shouldn’t). But that said, some foods to mostly avoid include:
Processed foods- most food products that come in a box, bag, can, or jar, and have multiple ingredients (especially ones you don’t recognize);
Refined grains like white rice and white flour;
Sugars and artificial sweeteners (they’re not any better for you than regular sugar);
Alcohol- it has no nutritional value and can lead to many health problems.
Focus more on quality than quantity
For many women, counting calories has led to unhealthy behaviors and feelings around food. And I tend to find that most women don’t actually want to count calories or macros. That said, quantity is important. Be careful not to overeat, especially if what you’re overeating is healthy but calorie-dense foods like nuts and fats. Bottom line, aim for quality foods, but also aim for balance.
Eat Balanced meals
One of the easiest tricks to sustaining energy throughout the day and keeping your appetite at bay is to eat balanced meals. Here’s what that looks like:
Protein + Fat + Fiber
This is what will balance your blood sugar, reduce food-related stress on your body, and provide you stable energy. Example of what this can look like: instead of an apple for an afternoon snack, have an apple plus a small handful of almonds.
Give yourself a break sometimes
Perfection is the enemy of progress. We all have junk foods that we absolutely love and that soothe our soul. Plus, there’s plenty of occasions where you’ll want to be able to share a meal with people you love.
So expect that these times for eating ‘whatever’ will come up, and enjoy them! I like to look at this from the perspective of the “90/10 rule”. Most of the time (90%) focus on eating high quality healthy foods that nourish you. And occasionally (10%) indulge in the birthday cake, the holiday dinner, the cookout, or your favorite meal at your favorite restaurant.
The goal is to live your life and be happy, not to constantly restrict yourself. Allowing indulgences- treating them as normal and acceptable- is a big part of what will make healthy eating a lifestyle for you rather than a short-term experiment.
What if you’re eating right but you’re still not reaching your health goals?
You’re eating all the right things, but you’re not losing weight. Even worse, maybe you’re gaining weight. Or you were trying to boost your energy but you’re still exhausted all the time. A few scenarios are possible.
First, diet is an important part of your overall health, but it’s not the only part. Whether or not you exercise, get enough sleep, are hydrating, and managing stress are also key factors that can impact hormone balance, weight, and how you feel. So you’ll want to get those habits in check, too.
Second, it’s always possible that you do have a medical condition that is causing your weight gain, fatigue or other problems. So it’s also important for you to discuss your concerns with your doctor.
