Ditch your New Year's resolutions (and do THIS instead)
It’s that time of year again, friends. The time of year when millions of people are starting to give up on their New Year’s resolutions. If this is you, no worries- I’ve got your back! As a health coach, the crux of my job is to help people make sustainable changes in their lives- in other words, to help foster habit change. And that’s essentially what New Year’s resolutions are about. So here are five action steps you can take today to help you reach your health goals this year.
Step 1: Resolve to take action today
Friends, I’ve gotta do some myth busting here, so hang tight:
January 1st is no different than any other day of the year
It may feel like there’s some mystical magic surrounding New Year’s Day. Like you’ll be cleansed of all your sins and able to start anew on whatever it is you’re working on. But the truth is, you’re no more likely to succeed with health-related goals that you set on January 1st than on any other day of the year.
In fact, there is no perfect time to start taking steps to improve your health or life. Out of the 365 days in the year, the perfect day to start is today. And the next best time is tomorrow.
If you wait for the perfect time to start, you’ll be waiting forever.
Often, I hear people say things like this:
“I’ll start working on my diet once things calm down in my life a bit more.”
Or:
”As soon as the kids are back in school, I’m going to start running again.”
Or this one:
“I want to start eating better, but I’ve got a vacation coming up in a couple weeks. So I’ll wait until after that and then I’ll be ready.”
When you say these things, you probably really do mean. A big part of you desires change. Something better.
So why do you make excuses and keep waiting or the perfect time? May sound strange, but it’s your reptilian brain protecting you from “danger”.
Excuses like “it’s not the right time’ are reasons your brain comes up with to keep you ‘safe’, because change can be scary! There’s a lot of unknowns- Will it work? Will I be able to do the work? Will it hurt or be difficult?
Humans love feeling safe and comfortable and making a change flies directly in the face of that comfort. And if you never try to change, you’ll be able to keep feeling safe. But you’ll also never know what life might look like on the other side.
So let’s counter this big excuse about the “perfect time”.
Aside from short wellness retreats where you’re literally isolated from everyday life, you’re never going to have “perfect conditions” to start changing your diet, to start exercising, to start meditating, etc.
Life is always happening, throwing you a curveball when you least expect or want it. And when you allow yourself to believe that conditions must be perfect in order for you to take action, you’re essentially allowing your external environment to control you, your behavior, and your health and life.
Do you like being controlled? Heck, I don’t! So why not reject that control and live an empowered life? Whatever change you’re looking to make, start today, with imperfect action. Accept that conditions won’t be perfect every day, and YOU won’t be perfect every day either. And when you fall into old habits, shake it off, and get back to it the next day. Or the next hour. You alone have the power to change your health and life. Read that again and say it out loud. You alone have the power to change your health and life.
Step 2: Set A Clear Goal That You Can Achieve And That Is Important To You
One of the first things I coach my clients on when we start working together is setting goals. It’s easier said than done, but having a clear idea of the person you want to become makes it much more likely that you’ll get there.
Goals can range from outcomes (losing weight) to habits (stop smoking) to mindset shifts and intentions (be more kind to myself). Any of these types of goals are fine, as long as the goal is clear, achievable, and important to you.
SPECIFIC, CLEAR, AND MEASURABLE
First, you need goals that are specific. “Getting healthy” is not specific. Even “eating better” isn’t too specific because it’s not clear what “better” means. So set a goal that’s clear and specific so that you know what you’re working towards. For example, “run a road race”, “lose weight”, and “lower my A1C” are all specific goals.
Smaller goals- specific habit changes- are often easier to achieve because they can give you a quick win and boost your motivation. For example, “take a walk every morning” or “meditate every day” or “eat protein at every meal”.
You’ll want your specific goal to be easy to measure, too. And you’ll want a time by which you aim to complete the goal.
So if your goal is to lose weight, how much weight do you want to lose, and by what point in time? If your goal is to run in a road race, what sort of race? A 5k? A marathon? And what’s the timeline to completion?
If you’re going to take a walk every morning, how long or far will you walk? If you’re going to eat more vegetables, how will you know if you’re really doing it?
By getting this specific, you also open the door to tracking your progress. For example, if you plan to meditate for 5 minutes every morning, you can check off on your calendar each day that you do it. A little bit of simple progress tracking can often serve as an extra boost of motivation to keep going, and help hold you accountable.
ACHIEVABLE AND REALISTIC
You might be dreaming of running the Boston Marathon. But what if you’ve never run a mile before? Choosing the marathon as a goal might not be so realistic and without setting any smaller goals to work towards in the meantime, you might become overwhelmed and lose your motivation pretty quick.
It’s similar for goals like weight loss. Losing weight in a sustainable manner- i.e. doing it in a way where you keep it off instead of gaining it back a few months later- can take a lot longer that most people imagine. Or meditation. If you’ve never meditated before, then pushing yourself to do 30 minutes a day 7 days a week might land you in the “failure” zone pretty quick.
So what can you do? First, set a goal you can reasonably achieve. And second, break down big goals into smaller ones. If you want to lower your A1C, what steps would you need to take in order to make that happen? What smaller goals could you set yourself?
Setting smaller, bite sized goals that you can achieve will make your experience more rewarding- and make you more likely to succeed.
YOUR GOAL SHOULD MATTER to You
Lastly, make sure that the goal you’ve chosen is important to you. For example, many people in January choose to go vegan or avoid alcohol for the month. Both are valid goals but do they matter to you? You’re unlikely to succeed at someone else’s goal. Instead, your goals must fit into your vision of your life. Which brings us to the next step.
Step 3: Know Your “Why”, and Return To It Often
Let’s say you want to meditate for 10 minutes every morning. Why do you want to do this? Dig deep and ask yourself this at least five times until you get to the root “why” that is motivating your decision. For example, if your immediate answer is “because I want to feel calm,” then ask yourself ‘why’ again- why do you want to feel calm? And so on.
I’d even recommend journaling about your goal and how this it connects to the big vision you have for your life. (And if you don’t have such a vision, that’s something to journal on, too).
When you have landed on your ‘why’, write it down on a piece of paper and post it somewhere in your home where you’ll see it every day. Say it out loud. Keep reminding yourself of your ‘why’. This motivate you to keep moving forward and taking action, even on days when you’re pressed for time or you don’t feel like it.
Step 4: Adopt the Mindset and Identity of the Person You Want to Be
Imagine you’ve already achieved your goal. What does your daily life look like? What thoughts run through your head? What beliefs do you hold? What habits do you practice?
To achieve your goal, you need to adopt the identity, mindset and actions of this person that you want to become. You need to act and think as if you already are this person. Easier said than done? Yes. But it works!
STEP 5: CREATE A PLAN OF ACTION
When setting health goals, many people skip right to this step but also don’t really put much thought into it. Creating new healthy behaviors is challenging for most of us. So you need to make it as easy on yourself as possible.
When I check in with clients, we almost always spend time strategizing how to make new habits work, whether it’s drinking more water or exercising or eating more greens. The strategies always differ because they need to fit into a specific person’s daily life. But there are some common things that you can consider when crafting your own strategy:
Schedule it into your calendar.
Whether it’s a daily walk, writing in your journal, or meal prep, write yourself in.
Track your progress.
You could do it in your planner if you have one, or create a tracking sheet and keep it somewhere visible in your house.
Find ways to make it as easy and convenient as possible to practice new habits.
Example: Laying out your workout clothes at night so you can put them on first thing in the morning and get in your workout.
Another example: Place a glass of water on your bedside table so it’s the first thing you drink when you wake up.
Make it difficult and inconvenient to continue habits you’re trying to break.
Example: if you’re trying to quit dairy, don’t keep ice cream in the house.
Set healthy boundaries, say “no” to activities and people that detract you from your goals, and seek support.
Let your close friends and family- especially your household- know what you’re working on and tell them how they can support you.
Reconsider your social circle.
Surround yourself with people who are going to lift you up and help you succeed. Trying to run every day? Join a local running club, or join a Facebook group for people who love to run. Allow others to inspire you!
Keep a healthy distance from people who don’t share your goals- and who may try to sabotage them, even if subconsciously. For example, if you’re trying to quit smoking, spending time with people who smoke will increase the chances that you go back to smoking.
Hold yourself accountable. You can do this by:
Consistently tracking your progress;
Rewarding yourself when you accomplish small milestones toward your goal;
Finding an accountability buddy- someone who you can check in with and report to on your progress, or even someone who has the same goal and is relying on you to hold them accountable.
I hope these tips are helpful. Good luck with your goals. And be sure to CELEBRATE your wins!
